I think this is more like behaviour guidelines than a TOS. I agree with sableantelope, from a legal standpoint most of these guidelines would likely already be covered by most user agreements. That being said, I've done big raffles and such before and I totally get that you might need these!
I think they could be a little more condensed -- #3 and #10 could be combined (something like "You may not contact me to give me updates on the character you have submitted, or to ask me to finish your review faster."), #5 could be combined with #6 and #9 ("The OC you submit must be your own (not your friend's or a heavily influenced/copied character), and by submitting an OC you are giving me permission to give you an honest critique and opinion on it.").
I think that #2, #4, and #8 are fine as-is. I kind of question the need for #7 but if you feel like you need the disclaimer then it's fine as-is.
I don't know if you have any guidelines for after the review is given, but you might want to add something like "You are under no obligation to edit your character following my review. If you do choose to edit your character, there is no need to credit me for the edits I've suggested." Maybe consider making a rule about whether people can re-submit a character that you've already reviewed?
no subject
I think they could be a little more condensed -- #3 and #10 could be combined (something like "You may not contact me to give me updates on the character you have submitted, or to ask me to finish your review faster."), #5 could be combined with #6 and #9 ("The OC you submit must be your own (not your friend's or a heavily influenced/copied character), and by submitting an OC you are giving me permission to give you an honest critique and opinion on it.").
I think that #2, #4, and #8 are fine as-is. I kind of question the need for #7 but if you feel like you need the disclaimer then it's fine as-is.
I don't know if you have any guidelines for after the review is given, but you might want to add something like "You are under no obligation to edit your character following my review. If you do choose to edit your character, there is no need to credit me for the edits I've suggested." Maybe consider making a rule about whether people can re-submit a character that you've already reviewed?